January 2012
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“Trust people until you can’t trust them.”
– Fred L.
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Choose. Between 36 book covers.
Tell me what you like and don’t like about them. Top three? Bottom three.
Last night, around the time I stopped having fun was when giving thinking on an author’s marketing decisions and then defending it against the input of other people who are not in the publicity or publishing business.
While I think layman’s opinions and outside thinking are so very important, it grinds me...
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“If a guy is a great dancer, does it mean he’s good in bed? Yes. He’s...”
– Tosh.O
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“Every week, Tebow picks someone who is suffering, or who is dying, or who is...”
– Rick Reilly, ESPN. Love the guy. Although his game? I hope he improves in the off-season so that we won’t be calling his team the Bad News Broncos.
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Brig: What material do you think this shirt is made of?
Kenny: I don't know. What?
Brig: Girlfriend material.
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A word about snakes in a bottle.
File this under lessons I learned the hard way.
Go easy when drinking anything natives call a medicine, especially if, word of warning - someone’s put a venomous snake in the bottle.
The reason it’s called a working man’s drink is because it’s given in small amounts to people with weak nutritional profiles. It’s a potion, not booze. Healthy people and anyone near...
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Jumanji is a film I'd pay to see in 3-D.
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“My MacBook Pro wont upload photos into my iPad. WHY ARE MY BEST FRIENDS...”
– Lisa F.
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Why did the baby cross the road?
Because you're an irresponsible parent.
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Thrilled The Beatles are on iTunes, but where's...
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“Have you ever met a person, you say, “Let’s get some parfait,”...”
– Genius pick-up line by pberntsen.
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“I’m looking for a LeBron James kind of relationship. No ring and I can...”
– Pimp Bill Clinton. Best new fake Twitter account. Also in gold, “Decided to run for public office again. Please support my bid for mayor of Cougar Town in 2012.”
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“What’s great about this country is that America started the tradition where the...”
– Andy Warhol
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Applying myself to the moment.
What I’m going to remember most about New Year’s Eve wasn’t when a relationship clicked into place for one of my best friends who spent half the evening on the phone with a guy halfway around the world, the venomous snake wine… crystal skull vodka and crystal skull shot glasses, trying to rescue a drowned phone by dunking it in quinoa (not an absorbent grain bt-dubs),...
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Me: Hmm. BlackBerry is selling the 64GB Playbook for $299.
Rob O: Can you get e-mail for that price? ;-)
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Black Book: Ashley Madison on The Profitability of... →
Sometimes I’m asked why I don’t pursue certain girls, and it’s because of the scenario Ashley Madison founder Noel Biderman lays out in the second paragraph. A girl who’s making herself available is a lot different from a girl who’s really available. I want to believe a girl who’s interested will still be interested once she sorts out whatever she has going...
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“If you were a new sandwich at Mcdonalds, you’d be called McGorgeous.”
– Overheard at Steppenwolf Theatre
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